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First world problems I am living with


Dang.

Here I thought life was going well.  SMH.

I find myself having to deal with the below inconveniences ever since a virus no one had heard of or felt took over the airwaves.  Cooped up too long for the most part here then is my Inside Edition -

  • Long and I mean a mile long lines to get into Costco (the warehouse superstore where 70" flat screen TVs greeted visitors with HD pictures of exotic oceanbeds and pristine alpine valleys).   No more free movies.  Now caution tape and multitude of greeters direct traffic like a communist control state to what meager supplies there might be.

  • Most germ killing items like lysol sprays and alcohol based sanitizers are out of stock.  Any paper product to wipe any surface from table top to butt holes are also out.  What is a germaphobe to do?
  • All goofy TV personalities are now broadcasting from home with ties on or gasping for breath and ratings and I cannot tell if they have pants on.  What a disappointment.  BTW the weather forecast is still crappy and all over the place.
  • People are standing an artificially mandated distance of six feet apart simply because America has all these extra feet to loiter in.  More clueless people on cell phones stuck looking down as the line moved up while the 20th guy has no idea what the hold up is.   
    I wonder if Australia requires people to stand 24 feet apart.  Just saying.  People are probably given free binoculars to see if the store they plan to enter today is actually open from a distance.
  • Cashiers trying to customers through but some insisting on cleaning each item purchased before bagging it ... leading to more artificial delays to buy a carton of eggs.  Which btw were not free range and corn fed but just run of the mill hen.. my whole diet has changed..whew!

  • Temperature checks by a person with a single digit IQ in front of desi grocery stores.  This girl who just dropped that thermometer in filth is in charge of beaming a strange signal to your forehead and nodding for you to go in.  I never saw anyone get ejected.  One lady refused to be temp checked.  LOL.
  • Social sites are becoming a ranting ground for housewives from claustrophobic suburbia to obscenity levels not seen since the second world war.
  • The revenue service is mailing stimulus money to dead people.
  • Amid this carnage there are signs of hope.  Variety of thugs are proudly wearing masks and ensuring they do not get their victims sick.
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