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Showing posts from February, 2012

Getting ready for the 200th

Blog that is. It has been two or so years that I took to writing what my heart desired - aha the joys of technology and I am now getting ready to celebrate this ridiculous 2nd century with the following arrangements in chronological order - 1. Roll out the old (red is overstated) carpet 2. Drink lots of Canadian Ice Wine (my favorite happens to be bottled in Niagara region of Canada) while sitting at one end of this carpet 3. Get a mood enhancing Jagjit CD playing close to the carepeted area 4. Perform a Vipassana or some cryptic move on the said carpet (after walking down it of course) allowing me to slap my own back for this mental achievement (and in the event of collapse from said manuever prevent permanent damage to the medulla that is responsible for cranking out the drivel) and celebrate... Suggestions to add more flavor and drama to this arrangement are welcome from readers ..assuming there are any left! Notice lack of candles and other meaningless accourtements.. I w

Sometimes Lost

It is interesting how personal preference, bias, taste (what beholder assumes to be one anyway) circumstance dictates what one can comprehend about the world they inhabit or tend to be lost in some cases.. Examples of me being lost - Oscar, Grammy, and other performing art category award recipients thanking their jillion or more family and work mates on live TV and in front of their peers. How is that relevant to anybody watching? Unless there is a surprise call out to a mystery candidate that helped shape the life of an otherwise forgotten cretin who has now made it to stardom.. that mention and corresponding applause would be worthy - not for the stereotypical father, mother and cast and crew. I mean it would be more interesting for them to actually call out the abnormalities one would think and say - I must point out that while working with the cast was a blast our director's tendency to let one out after lunch really soured the atmosphere in a manner of speaking..c'mon

Red Carpet Cliche?

Not a big fan of high paid rollers slapping each others' backs and having the world tune in to watch them do so (for which brand name advertisers shell out big bucks) I was not much inclined to watch the 2012 Oscars. However a few interesting takes on standard cliches in the movie industry in the past year (that I had the accident of watching) did make me want to observe who got nominated for respective categories. A name that sticks out for me is Gosling (no relation to a bird) - Ryan Gosling. Ides of March and Money Ball were two of my picks. He seems to have always been in the Hollywood backstage doing small parts until suddenly (to me anyways) landing some prominent roles with a wide variety. And he pulled them off with remarkable believableness.. George Clooney being George Clooney had no trouble producing, directing and acting his way in to some spots on those contending to walk with the statue. Meryl Streep seems to always want to make a comeback - she looks like she

Of Laplace and Theodolites

Oft in the media there is a renewed focus on discussing the quality of elementary school education as well as whether teachers in the public school system (those supported through direct tax payer dollars) should maintain their job by tenure or merit. This question to me is really two fold - the curriculum design /quality thereof in question and the delivery mechanism (i.e. the teacher in the classroom) used to translate it from the archaic prescription to usable and worthy material fit for consumption by the young minds walking in the school doors. As it relates to the former I think the modern public schools - and there is a wide variation in it depending on what part of the country you are in - adhere to a fairly robust data content which however could use a lot more tweaking with relation to cultural awareness building. I shall explain shortly. Aside from that the delivery of the same seems to be lacking severly in the quality of the elementary or high school staff employed by

What if we stopped pooping?

I know some may say what a shitty topic and they would be wrong - shit would lose its significance in popular vernacular. Yet if you think about this idea it may perhaps be the best invention ever. Humans essentially do two things to survive. Consume and subsequently defecate. The latter has serious implications because it serves to remove toxic build up in our bodies. Can medicine focus on process where the body adapts to completely process everything it intakes and shuts down after it has reached its limit? Of course each specimen will have its own limit based on age, gender, ethnicity, geography, aptitude etc. I think this is possible. There are several cactii in the wild and deserts of this world that do not need much to survive and if they do they get from the little mositure they find in the morning dew. They do not release any other waste. Most every living animal excretes in order to rid off its excess body fat or unprocessed material that it cannot hold on to. If th

Language ka maaza

Devils workshop at it again - Celebratory scotch for East Indians on Valentines Day - Ballantines Facebook entries for southerners - 'Like' that only Signage on a Marathi Dentist's sink - Yethe Thunka - tithe navhe (adapted from once ubiquitous pleas to denizens to not spit at will in public) Last but not least our brethren from the North would boast of buying the latest gadgets for friends on their recent trip to Canada - i Pad for averything jee

Wires Crossed

I dreamt last night about a situation where I had my brain malfunction - you know the proverbial wires crossed problem (actually not sure if that was a dream - my spouse swears sometimes it has already happened). I thought what if the brain's keyed responses came out at the wrong time and wrong place. There are number of situations where certain professions or roles ask the same standard questions (not really expecting an answer or expecting the templated response from the other)...so if your noggin went on the fritz here is what could happen - Bank Teller - would that be in 10s or 20s - you reply - I will take it all in plastic please; Cash Register at the grocery store - Paper or Plastic - you reply - Can I get five 5s and three 20s - no coins thank you; Port of Entry officer - How long were you gone sir? - you reply - I will take everything to go - bit of a hurry you see; Restaurant Order Taker - Here or to go? - you reply - We should do coffee sometime... so you see the

Passports and Visas

What the heck is all this paper? Why do the countries of the world still engage in this moronic ritual of having their citizenry carry bunch of books and stamps and papers to wander on the planet? Most of it is a jobs scheme I think ... other is revenue generation. Come to think of it you could simply institute a global database of fingerprints of anyone who desires to travel beyond a countries borders and have them scan the digit or two to gain entry. Visas could be granted based on an earlier elaborated topic using the RBI - or reliable bloke index. RBI is tied to the bloke's fingerprints. Higher RBI individuals qualify for global visas and can basically wander around like a high level diplomat. In fact some of the rotten diplomats would be the ones that would get scrutinized before allowing to travel if we institue the RBI. At this point it becomes irrelevant to know where you were born and even what your name is. Think about it - your name is only what someone dreamt o

A disarranged marriage

Some local friends sometimes ask innocently if mine was arranged..marriage that is. My response just to see if they are awake is to tell them that mine was disarranged. In truth they all are ... depends on how Clinton would define 'arrange'. There is a vast range there if you ask me. This is the problem with half assed depictions of other countries' cultures by a jaded media that cannot seem to get the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Arranged marriage is as stereotypical of Indian subcontinent as curries and tigers (at one point). Also the likelihood of me knowing the Patels down the corner...because they too are from India after all. So on the subject of what makes a marriage worthy or work is not so much how the arrangement came to be but how much Zen you are. The notion of bliss is directly related in the author's humble (oh well not so humble) opinion that the more easy going your life styles the more compatible you will be. The more serious or drive

At today's prices

$500 will buy you - 1 share of AAPL equity or 1 low end iPAD2 (plus taxes will actually drain you depending on which state you are in - Euphoric does not count) or 5 Barrels of Crude Oil (if the sheikhs feel like it) or Domestic Tue afternoon airplane ticket (to burn those barrels) from Des Moine IA to San Francisco CA on the worst airline of the year or 500 lbs of Gala Apples (real kind grown in a state north of here) - on sale now at your local GrocerMart or 2 designer jeans to fit that skinny butt in or 1 Deep cleaning of your mandibles so your smile is Priceless!

Perils of Idolizing

I think the two words 'Role Model' are over-rated. The problem is not so much in the idea of having one as much as the risk someone runs into when they discover that their so called role model was not so model after all. Perhaps that word has come to signify almost god like status of the model to the worshipee, where cracks in the armor lead to tremendous devestation of faith. Many a role models are and continue to be celebrities in their sphere of influence. From political leaders to star athletes to brilliant music personalities and art exemplaries these individuals have acheived fantastic heights in their space seemingly impossible for a human. Yet they did that through perseverance or hard work or mix of luck and moxie (I am thrilled to use this word moxie for the first time). So when they realize that they too are human and err and erred big they see that they create a storm of publicity of the negative kind and depending on their journalistic connections either are

Read my Bumper

Ones attached to the rear of an automobile that is. That is what a whole host of drivers on the road are saying - unless they are merely trying to hide a cosmetic imperfection on their derriere as I attest I once had (used a sticky that had the words Ouch! on it). When driving in a car crazy landscape such as Northern California you always happen on everything from Confucian wisdom to outright mystery to awareness of one's love for animals, humans, our planet et al that the driver apparently subscribes to. Its all out there for your reading pleasure as you ponder how long the metered light at this ramp is gonna take to spew your vehicle into the river of cars and semis rushing to their destination. Talk about mobile advertising bulletins these bumper stickers sometimes make you wonder as to the mental makeup of the owner. Like the oft seen 'Mystery Spot' toted largely by people of desi descent on their cars of Japanese origin. The sticker itself is a ghastly yellow wi

Content with content

In the day and age of Wikipedia and Google and self correcting editing software what would or should future schools look like? In an earlier blog I had expounded on the question of what makes for a good school or more importantly a valuable schooling experience. I would think the latter needs to be answered from point of view of the student as well as the teacher. In an ever evolving world where iPad is king and exams are open book with unlimited content, we have already seen the shift from rote based learning style to creative thinking. Whether this paradigm should extend to its logical conclusion of total elimination of prescribed curriculum based learning there by leaving the how much of what and when of subject matter to learn in hands of every student/ parent can or should be the subject of healthy debate. Just like my other radical idea of legalizing drugs of all kind we should seriously consider the pros and cons of having our governments spend exorbitant sums to provide sub

The Facebook Premise

Disclaimers: I do not have a Facebook account. No, this is not a critique of some Ludlumesque thriller. Rather when I got to thinking about what makes Mr. Zuck truly smart I realized two things - 1. He figured out how people (in the US and anywhere in the world) are vain and strive to associate themselves to a brand - any brand (from alumni plates decorating their cars to the beverages they buy or purses they carry to the gods they install in their automobiles) and put it out on display. 2. He created a technology to allow that to happen easily using a computer and then he hired some of the smartest marketeers in the business from other marquee brands in the valley to launch his enterprise and let them sell the coolaid to the world.. always hungry for more branded commodities. Facebook became that forum - a new way to announce to the world what makes you tick, scratch, itch, laugh or morose. By association your likes and dislikes also became a feature of the tool that apparent

Rear View Mirror

A modern automobile is equipped with three of these. One on each side of the vehicle and one in the interior right above the driver's head. The implied directive is - use them to aid in safe movement from A to B. Here are ways that my blank wandering mind thinks various cultures have decided to use the interior mirror (or in some cases any mirror) instead - 1. Indians - what mirror? 2. American Women - Vanity on the go - their front end is more important than the front view 3. Germans - Working on an even more intelligent mirror 4. Japanese - Its there believe us - you just can't see it 5. French and Italians - Point it upward to the sky in case you hit your head on it... 6. Chinese and all AsiaPac island nations - good hanger for all manners of talisman and red threads 7. Less affluent - steal it - and resell it

Child Rearing

Is there a child fronting I immediately wondered but of course not. This is akin to tags that Costco cashiers and returns desk staff wear proclaiming 'Front End' which often leads me to think if the stockers and shipping dockers have the obvious 'Rear End' writ all over their name plates. They do not! The world is unfair. But I digress. Let us focus on the Rearor and the Rearee. Matter at hand is the excerpt I read in today's WSJ that an American author penned while living and working in Paris, France about why middle class American children (generally in the infant to toddler category) were an obnoxious bunch compared to their Parisian counterparts. Her observations centered around the French way of life, focusing on not servicing every need of their offspring when they thought they had one but rather letting the kid wait. Patience was indeed an virtue taught early she concludes. Also the conviction of saying what you mean (of the No or Non kind) versus th