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Elevator Pitch

Many ways to look at this cliched term. Unless you are wandering in a newly constructed high end property chances are the elevators in the building will make some sort of noise. Lets call it their pitch. Also, unless its an odd hour that you tend to wander in elevators you will always have company. To the point that someone's BO will cause you to flinch. Said flinching from a person of considerable dimensions (hence the elevator to move about) can cause the physical contraption to pitch (or yaw if you are an aviator who likes this sort of lingo). That would be another example of elevator pitch. But of course what most so called hiring managers and generally managers and directors and Veeps and so on are yamming about is your concise marketing campagin that can be delivered to someone with influence while riding vertically. Your elevator pitch. I have always been baffled by the amount of lingo and jargon and terminology that spews out of these so called A+ types. To actually have something to convey to another person in order to make an impression is like trying to score a date at a bar. This is higher stakes because you are trying to make an impression that will cause the listener to contribute to your monthly paycheck. So to actually come up with wit and whistle in an elevator incorporating all aforementioned 'pitch' inducing scenarios is an effort with great elevation. I am not sure there are any such pitches. If I see a janitor in an elevator and ask him to make a pitch is he expected to say something like - I manage the systems that ensure efficient functioning of these premises? Or more like - I clean your toilets? The first answer is BS (or HS more like) and the latter is concise. Today's world is so full of shit that they have actually lost the ability to decipher which is which. Hence the emphasis on pitch. You see stark examples of so called pitches left and right - even in the toilet bowl that the janitor just cleaned. Its telling me to sign up for YOGA classes with the janitor's wife (who runs these classes downstairs)! And please take the stairs - there ain't no pitch there. You think someone has any air left to bark nonsense after climbing that elevation?

Comments

  1. Yes, I agree..taking the stairs is good..you can avoid all the 'pitchers' and help your heart, and other organs remain healthy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. In Telugu, pi(t)chivallu are the crazy people- those who pitch in this manner!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks for adding to my non-existent Telugu vocabulary. I will try to remember this when I wander the Telangana. Perhaps these folk make it into cricket?

    ReplyDelete

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