Skip to main content

New iPhone leaked

It made headlines.  Because it was a big leak.  It was sitting in a woman's purse at a Starbucks inside a Starbucks and even then, all of a sudden, people noticed it.

The purse had got wet and there was a foul odor accompanied by a trickle oozing and then dripping faster than what the baristas were pulling from their imported coffee makers.

All the techies gawked, along with the millennial gen who hitherto were involved with rapid fire texting and OMG and LOLS.  What in the world was this?

Even the utility crews who fancied an occasional thrice a week splurge on pricey caffeine that were not planning a visit that day stumbled in from their site as the odor overpowered them and one of them fell out of his perch near a transformer.  He wasn't transformed but the odor dragged them to see what gas this was.

Meanwhile the gal from the restroom whose purse it was shows up and gets agog at the brouhaha surrounding her carryall.  Who's in my 'coach' she shrieked?

Now local cops and some media type arrived to add to the melee only to discover that this hyper blonde had forgot to dump her fourth child's, three day old diaper after yanking it from a recent incident on the road heading to (or from) wine country.

Her latest iPhone sat next to this package had interacted with the warm contents and somehow leaked its own chemicals that caused this turn of events.

Last reports indicate she was suing both Apple and P&G.  Apple because her haptic interface had become septic and P&G because they could not keep (her shit) a secret.

Comments

  1. was it a geeky leak or a leaky geek or a warmth that went too far?

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

But What If We're Wrong?

I attempted to read this book by author Chuck Klosterman backward to forward but it started hurting my brain so I decided to stop and do it like any other publication in the English language.  Start from page 1 and move to the right. Witty, caustic and thought provoking this is a book you want to read if you believe that the status quo might, just might be wrong. At times bordering on being contrarian about most things around us it tries to zero in on the notion of what makes anything believable and certain in our minds.  The fact that there is a fact itself is ironic.  Something analogous to the idea that you can never predict the future because there is no future. Many books and movies have tried to play on this concept - best that I recollect (I think I am) was 'The Truman Show'.  This book by Klosterman attempts to provoke the reader to at least contemplate that what they think they know may be wrong. He uses examples like concept of gravity, and how it ...

You are important to us

Followed by piano music.   Followed by 'we are experiencing heavier than usual call volume'.  Sounds macabre like bleeding during menstruation or after a ghastly attack with a weapon on a hemophiliac.  Sorry Mrs. Johnson but it appears little Gertrude here has been bleeding heavier than usual what with her night time activities competing with the woodchucks in your neighborhood. Some services even go as far as to pick a random day to say - 'if you were to call us during the Chinese lunar month when the moon is axiomatically hugging the polar star with Jupiter intravenous when call volume is light'.  Well I will be damned.  I thought  I had checked with my astrologer before I placed this well focused call but  I guess this is what you get for listening to a quack. Umph! I am not sure which marketing genius came up with this personal touch concept of informing the caller that you are really a jackass for actually calling the customer serv...

Of Jims and Johns

Here is another essay on the subject of first names. As in birth names. Or names provided to an offspring at birth. While the developed world tends to shy away from the exotic like Refrigerator or Coca Cola for their new production there is a plethora of Jims and Johns and Bobs or Robs. Speaking of which I do not think there is a categoric decision point at the time of birth if a child will be hereafter called as Bob. I mean have not yet met a toddler called Bob or Rob for that matter. At some point though the parental instinct to mouth out multiple syllables runs out and they switch from calling the crawler Robert to simply Robbie to Rob. Now speaking of - it is strange that the name sounds like something you would not want Rob to do - i.e. Rob anyone. Then why call someone that? After all Rob Peter to Pay Paul is not exactly a maxim to live a young life? Is it? Perhaps Peter or Paul might want to have a say in it? Then there is this matter of going to the John. Why degrad...