What exactly does a Conditioner do?

Specifically those meant for use with hair - human hair. Yes - the Lever, Gamble and Proctor families will have their goons looking for me again but the truth shall set me free or something. To this day I stay confounded. Hence I have never purchased one. Perhaps the kryptonite, I mean keratinite in my hairy mass has some unique qualities inherited from the lowly follicle they arise from as I never had the need for my hair to be conditioned. I mean soaps or detergents I maybe get. You have some germs or grease or form of debris that you accumulated from the 'day in the life of' that you need to rid off before getting to bed. A good lather created by a surfactant (key ingredient of a lathering agent) will aid in removal of such detritus. Shampoos too are a stretch but maybe plausible given the need to get into the strands of hair. As such it is nothing more than a liquid soap. But then comes the mysterious cousin to all this - the Conditioner. Taking a page from an air-conditioner I can see what a conditioner ought to do - filter, moisten and modulate the temperature of the mass it comes in contact with i.e. condition it so that it is person friendly. People that condition their hair do not filter or modulate their hair temperature with this concoction far as I can tell. As far as mostening goes - well I never heard of a conditioner that did so without water so seems redundant to buy something in a bottle to moisten when the water that you need to go with it is doing just that if nothing else. Then of course there are varying kinds of these so called conditioners - to suit the varying scalps that are desirous of conditioning. Could a placebo be at work here? Everything from extra dry scalps and hair to those that are coarse haired to thin haired or worse lacking in hair have conditioners marketed to, bottled in exotic looking containers with caps and pumps to get you going with this fluid in copious quantities. Then again the irony of it is that all this money is being spent to tend the very thing that needs to be mowed (in either sex) since too much of a good thing is also not acceptable to the superficial society we live in. So on we go with our inane lives - conditioning then mowing then conditioning so we can mow again. It reminds me of a definition of a commuter - one that takes the train and comes back to shave again! Going back to dwell on this retarded blog one cannot help but think of many such adventures in marketing where the Dabur and Balsara families (back in the day) took a crack at peddling the likes of Shikekai to the Indian females imploring them to use this new found, well researched product to yield (frankly gross smelling) shiny black tendrils from their skulls. This was sure to appease the spouse as he came back from his commute it promised. I mean if the western world did not know of Shikekai (and we can safely assume they still do not) then were their scalps completely falling off? What of those in Australia? What were these indigenous people using? Clearly the scam continues to the day. The more exotic the berry or the nut that can yield a non pronunciable oil the more likely it is to create a Kesh Bonanza! Perhaps a subject of another blog but there are many such creations that I have frankly found borderline ridiculous to outright scams as in the pocket square that has to go in to the pocket of a suit, the latter also a marketed gimmic. Then there is the necktie which if all else fails has served the unique purpose of letting the occupier hang from it. So the question continues to vex the simple mind - what does this Conditioner do? Reminds me of 'Dhundte Rehe Jaoge' tag line famously touting a Lever branded 'Surf'actant back in India.

Presumptive Society

Today's world is hyper connected. I am not so sure what it means but you hear it a lot. It is probably hyper but not sure how connected it is. Sugar (fermented or not) is available in many ways than before and so getting hyper is easy. It is probably more a threat than cocaine since it is sold legally. And what is this connected stuff? Most people I encounter seem disconnected from reality. So going back to this assumption that we are connected there are subtle and no so subtle instances of how brands and companies and middle men try to portray someone - A linkedin profile for somebody working for X years at a place advertises to the connected network that so and so is CELEBRATING X years @ Such and Such Inc. Do we know if (s)he is celebrating or cringing? Perhaps a better way to portray will be - So and So LASTED X years @ such & such inc. Then it exhorts the readership to go ahead and congratulate them for this lasting effe...

Of Jims and Johns

Here is another essay on the subject of first names. As in birth names. Or names provided to an offspring at birth. While the developed world tends to shy away from the exotic like Refrigerator or Coca Cola for their new production there is a plethora of Jims and Johns and Bobs or Robs. Speaking of which I do not think there is a categoric decision point at the time of birth if a child will be hereafter called as Bob. I mean have not yet met a toddler called Bob or Rob for that matter. At some point though the parental instinct to mouth out multiple syllables runs out and they switch from calling the crawler Robert to simply Robbie to Rob. Now speaking of - it is strange that the name sounds like something you would not want Rob to do - i.e. Rob anyone. Then why call someone that? After all Rob Peter to Pay Paul is not exactly a maxim to live a young life? Is it? Perhaps Peter or Paul might want to have a say in it? Then there is this matter of going to the John. Why degrad...

On the go(zay masta) in Japan again

Cool cat the Japanese are Tokyo at dusk My second visit to this land of the rising sun after almost a decade. Back then clearly I was wet behind the ears product manager and likely didn’t pay attention to all (efficient) things Japanese. But today I did and of course continue to be impressed. It is as much the obvious stuff like on time travel that is both clean and comfortable and all that which makes it possible. The impressive landmark and landscapes that these humans have put together despite their cramped (or because of it) surroundings and precarious geological conditions could amaze a novice architect among us. But it’s also the little things that someone had to think about which have a phenomenal impact on day to day lives that make the Japanese stand apart. Below are few random examples- 1. Providing a very fine machined wooden toothpick in every packet of wooden chopsticks. The said chapsticks are simply set on the To Go counter of any food vendor/ convenience store wher...

Brown Motion

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