I want to thank

It sounds like I am on my last leg ... as in famous or infamous last words... yet many a moron takes the microphone to start thanking all the yokels they have ever met and their barbie collections when put in the spotlight. Oscars and Grammys which are a uniquely American phenom are testament. What is the point of all that thanking? Rich people publicly thanking other rich people for rubbing when it itches is hardly etiquette or manners. Anyway what I want to do is think of serious items that need thanking - 1. Lets start with daybreak - I want to thank the SUN for showing up each morning without fail. How about that? How many of us clumsies can make such a promise? Regardless of man made holidays and other mumbo this jumbo bulb never fails. Except when its total lights out - and some asteroid escapes NASA's tracking and simply slams us all out of existence. Then who is going to wake up to see it anyway? 2. I want to thank the rivers that continue to provide life sustaining liquids in raw (as in drinking water) form or a raw material that man has learned to tame (as in scotch). 3. The planet for putting up with all of our collective abuse and turning a blind eye to the idiocy it witnesses daily. It still is the only source of any manner of nutrition that keeps us producing more idiotic ideas daily. 4. Our immediate family that puts up with whatever idiocy you do produce and unconditionally forgives (in the hope that you are going to wake up one day and thank them).