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Rear End

In American lexicon these two words carry a lot of import.  Both scenarios are common place as in -

1. People want to attempt to lose weight and the rear is big on the watch list - they will go to all manners of extremes to ensure that a method involving giving up large sums of money will reduce the rear end size from X to Y (latter being many sizes less than X)

2. Car accident - People rear end other people all the time.  As in while texting and driving or simply not understanding the laws of physics or being in a state of inattention due to a variety of factors too long to describe in a blog.

I had a close encounter of the second kind last night.  As we left a public parking lot in a mall in the burbs I started to back my vehicle out slowly watching the rear view mirror.  As I was almost done with my reverse I saw a massive Suburban (large vehicle that could double as a bomb shelter or a tourist bus in many third world countries) back out at high velocity (the occupants someone that we had witnessed earlier in a store as being hopped on nicotine and some other chemicals) as if my vehicle did not exist.

Since I took many courses in physics I was aware of what was coming and knowing there was not enough time to safely accelerate away I switched gears and started pulling back into my parking stall.  But the retard backing out was so fast that it still managed to scrape my rear bumper.  Hence the rear end to rear end impact.

I called the local police.  They told me to exchange insurance since there was no physical harm to humans, and hung up.  Budget cuts.

So I did and filed a claim.  The other person did not have a license plate on their car.  They barely realized what they had done and seemed to moronically stare at us as if they were surprised our car was blocking their way out.

Time will tell how the insurance company handles this case since it is a potential matter of 'he said, she said'.

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