Costume or Uniform

 I like to wear comfortable clothing based on the climate I am spending time in. It is functional and to a degree soothing to my own eye in terms of its color and assembly. Some might describe the latter as style. Okay so be it.

Beyond that to me clothing is not a topic of interest or discussion. Of course affordability of said item is critical but here again the functional aspect manifests. More durable the item the more value I derive from its lifespan spent protecting me from the elements.

To a large body of humans that is not as cut and dry. Garments worn take the form of self expression and to a degree help in defining these people. Dress for success is the slogan.  Always wear clothing for who you aspire to be one exhorts. And so on are cliches I have heard growing up and they echo a certain reliance on vanity of the species to make sure you are heard in a crowd.

While I might not subscribe to such silliness I do appreciate what the authors of that expression were trying to communicate. Then there is the extravagance. Whether in the form of outlandish color and cut and presentation when it comes to everything from hats to clothing both overt and what is not supposed to be overt to shoes one might choose to wear on their hind legs.

Elaine (a Seinfeld character) in the late 90s presents a braless friend the sarcastic gift of a bra only to find her flaunting it as a top in the streets of Manhattan. That pretty much punctuates the human condition. For what may be decorum there is someone that veers outside the lines. Again to a degree not a big deal since the action does not hurt my well being. But it does raise a question of whether it pushes the boundaries to where naked people are in fact roaming the streets of San Francisco and occupying public spaces.  Now I can get infected with their DNA what with their shit (literally) floating in the air.

Moving to more dramatic expressions of clothing is the question I pose in the title of this essay.  What constitutes a costume versus a uniform?  And to what end?

Uniform as the name suggests is all about conformity. Military members or postal workers or your local sanitation crew as well as the staff at your favorite grocer wear company branded clothing with certain qualities. It immediately sends a visual cue as to their role in society and an unadvertised advertising for what they can help with.  I protect and serve.  I point you to kidney beans in a can in aisle 15. Etc.

Useful and pragmatic. Now take costumes. Described as a garment worn by a person trying to be artistic in some arena of human expression whether dance, or music or other physical activity like juggling.  Also conveys some information about their intent and helps us appreciate their art.

But all that rational arrangement goes out the window when suddenly you have the global rich both with healthy and ill gotten gains start flaunting their wealth using what I find are comical satirical choices. 

Recent coronation of an old white male in London was a fine display of the goofiest of costumes being paraded by many including the guest of honor. A man called Charles (in part because naming people with numbers next to their name is somehow considered a sign of prosperity) was anointed King. While that part in itself is hilarious - I mean what is a King? - the garments worn by him including a gold crown and weird colored frocks and robes made it seem like some out of place orgy gone awry. He kept getting surrounded by old and older geezers also wearing some random silk and damask woven garments that flowed and must have been extremely hot under the circumstances.

What was the point of all that nonsense? Some might argue there was pomp and splendor in the event and a certain tradition but to me it was way out of place. We do not live in 17th century anymore. We have a better form of governance and law and order and we have moved to a new plane one would think.  Then the similar spectacle is witnessed when dignitaries including our very own president flies all over the place. What's with the marines saluting on either side of the aircraft stairs when he descends?  They look pretty sharp at least what without a crown and all but again why waste time in that looking at an uncertain point on the horizon when you could perhaps lend him a hand in case he stumbles? A uniform becomes a distraction when not needed in the form of extra staff simply performing a role like standing at attention or walking beside someone for no apparent functional reason. 

There the uniform to me becomes a costume and it is out of place.  Having parades and armies march in uniform or having all of the presentation of gallantry awards wearing various metal medals on your coat are just vain attempts to decorate people.

Medals and ribbons and buttons are another major nit but one thing at a time. All manners of ceremonies also need scrutiny.  We have far too many of them with no particular need.  People are dying of more imminent threats and last thing we as a species need is more organized parades to point our cameras at.