Skip to main content

Eat Shit

Used to be that 'Genie in a Bottle' was a billboard hit. Now an incarnation of 'Eat Shit' or 'Coffee in the Poop' baby is somewhat indirectly top of the charts. As in coffee extracted from the poop of certain wild mammals - it appears is THE ELIXIR to have. How did the coffee bean get in the poop in the first place. You feed said animal said beans. From civets to elephants, coffee consumption is on the rise since the humans it seems are weaning off and resorting to Tea. Someone came up with the idea to stop the trend reversal (guess who?) and encourage the idiotic human race to try a new idea. Turd 'o' matic range of coffee makers is now soon hitting store shelves from Bangkok to Burundi to Baton Rouge and everywhere in between. Special manufacturing instructions will be shipped with each personally engraved stinking pot for the true connoisseur. Each comes with 20 servings of beans. The most exclusive collection will feature the actual turds still warm (vacuum sealed) and delivered fresh by overnite 'Poo' P S to your address. The jungle literally at your doorstep for the right fee. Photos of mammals that produced the beans will be available for an extra fee. Imagine immersing yourself inside the internals of a wild mammal sniffing all the aromas that lend your beverage that unbeatable flavor without leaving your family room. Adopt a pet foundations are partnering with the farmers to brand each species into exciting new outerwear and mugs. Now if I could only make use of my leftovers and come up with a capital idea I could retire and not need any caffeine to start my dull day.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

On the go(zay masta) in Japan again

Cool cat the Japanese are Tokyo at dusk  My second visit to this land of the rising sun after almost a decade. Back then clearly I was wet behind the ears product manager and likely didn’t pay attention to all (efficient) things Japanese. But today I did and of course continue to be impressed. It is as much the obvious stuff like on time travel that is both clean and comfortable and all that which makes it possible. The impressive landmark and landscapes that these humans have put together despite their cramped (or because of it) surroundings and precarious geological conditions could amaze a novice architect among us. But it’s also the little things that someone had to think about which have a phenomenal impact on day to day lives that make the Japanese stand apart. Below are few random examples- 1. Providing a very fine machined wooden toothpick in every packet of wooden chopsticks. The said chapsticks are simply set on the To Go counter of any food vendor/ convenience store wher...

Presumptive Society

Today's world is hyper connected.  I am not so sure what it means but you hear it a lot.  It is probably hyper but not sure how connected it is.  Sugar (fermented or not) is available in many ways than before and so getting hyper is easy.  It is probably more a threat than cocaine since it is sold legally. And what is this connected stuff?  Most people I encounter seem disconnected from reality.  So going back to this assumption that we are connected there are subtle and no so subtle instances of how brands and companies and middle men try to portray someone - A linkedin profile for somebody working for X years at a place advertises to the connected network that so and so is CELEBRATING X years @ Such and Such Inc. Do we know if (s)he is celebrating or cringing?  Perhaps a better way to portray will be - So and So LASTED X years @ such & such inc. Then it exhorts the readership to go ahead and congratulate them for this lasting effe...

The Central State aka MP

Narmada river and site of Omkareshwar Indore Rajwada or palace of the Lady Holkar   Somewhat geographically centered in India is the hot landscape of MADHYA PRADESH. A region I had a faint memory of visiting as a young lad eons ago. Now in my (along with my best half) quest to get to know lands far and wide I got an opportunity to visit Indore city and surrounding areas in MP. It begins with an evening visit to a bustling old market selling native snacks both savory and sweet. It is the realm of jewelers who run night time street side restaurants once they close their primary operations at dusk. Think of it as desi style block party that I am told goes into wee hours of the morning. My impression was it is worth one visit.  The humid and hot ambience along with crush of humanity doesn’t make for a pleasant dining experience but the sheer variety of foods sort of makes up for it. From piping hot coconut filled fritters to oodles of milk based sweet confections, I gorged on item...