Skip to main content

First world problems I am living with


Dang.

Here I thought life was going well.  SMH.

I find myself having to deal with the below inconveniences ever since a virus no one had heard of or felt took over the airwaves.  Cooped up too long for the most part here then is my Inside Edition -

  • Long and I mean a mile long lines to get into Costco (the warehouse superstore where 70" flat screen TVs greeted visitors with HD pictures of exotic oceanbeds and pristine alpine valleys).   No more free movies.  Now caution tape and multitude of greeters direct traffic like a communist control state to what meager supplies there might be.

  • Most germ killing items like lysol sprays and alcohol based sanitizers are out of stock.  Any paper product to wipe any surface from table top to butt holes are also out.  What is a germaphobe to do?
  • All goofy TV personalities are now broadcasting from home with ties on or gasping for breath and ratings and I cannot tell if they have pants on.  What a disappointment.  BTW the weather forecast is still crappy and all over the place.
  • People are standing an artificially mandated distance of six feet apart simply because America has all these extra feet to loiter in.  More clueless people on cell phones stuck looking down as the line moved up while the 20th guy has no idea what the hold up is.   
    I wonder if Australia requires people to stand 24 feet apart.  Just saying.  People are probably given free binoculars to see if the store they plan to enter today is actually open from a distance.
  • Cashiers trying to customers through but some insisting on cleaning each item purchased before bagging it ... leading to more artificial delays to buy a carton of eggs.  Which btw were not free range and corn fed but just run of the mill hen.. my whole diet has changed..whew!

  • Temperature checks by a person with a single digit IQ in front of desi grocery stores.  This girl who just dropped that thermometer in filth is in charge of beaming a strange signal to your forehead and nodding for you to go in.  I never saw anyone get ejected.  One lady refused to be temp checked.  LOL.
  • Social sites are becoming a ranting ground for housewives from claustrophobic suburbia to obscenity levels not seen since the second world war.
  • The revenue service is mailing stimulus money to dead people.
  • Amid this carnage there are signs of hope.  Variety of thugs are proudly wearing masks and ensuring they do not get their victims sick.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Of Jims and Johns

Here is another essay on the subject of first names. As in birth names. Or names provided to an offspring at birth. While the developed world tends to shy away from the exotic like Refrigerator or Coca Cola for their new production there is a plethora of Jims and Johns and Bobs or Robs. Speaking of which I do not think there is a categoric decision point at the time of birth if a child will be hereafter called as Bob. I mean have not yet met a toddler called Bob or Rob for that matter. At some point though the parental instinct to mouth out multiple syllables runs out and they switch from calling the crawler Robert to simply Robbie to Rob. Now speaking of - it is strange that the name sounds like something you would not want Rob to do - i.e. Rob anyone. Then why call someone that? After all Rob Peter to Pay Paul is not exactly a maxim to live a young life? Is it? Perhaps Peter or Paul might want to have a say in it? Then there is this matter of going to the John. Why degrad...
2 comments
Read more

But What If We're Wrong?

I attempted to read this book by author Chuck Klosterman backward to forward but it started hurting my brain so I decided to stop and do it like any other publication in the English language.  Start from page 1 and move to the right. Witty, caustic and thought provoking this is a book you want to read if you believe that the status quo might, just might be wrong. At times bordering on being contrarian about most things around us it tries to zero in on the notion of what makes anything believable and certain in our minds.  The fact that there is a fact itself is ironic.  Something analogous to the idea that you can never predict the future because there is no future. Many books and movies have tried to play on this concept - best that I recollect (I think I am) was 'The Truman Show'.  This book by Klosterman attempts to provoke the reader to at least contemplate that what they think they know may be wrong. He uses examples like concept of gravity, and how it ...
2 comments
Read more

Presumptive Society

Today's world is hyper connected.  I am not so sure what it means but you hear it a lot.  It is probably hyper but not sure how connected it is.  Sugar (fermented or not) is available in many ways than before and so getting hyper is easy.  It is probably more a threat than cocaine since it is sold legally. And what is this connected stuff?  Most people I encounter seem disconnected from reality.  So going back to this assumption that we are connected there are subtle and no so subtle instances of how brands and companies and middle men try to portray someone - A linkedin profile for somebody working for X years at a place advertises to the connected network that so and so is CELEBRATING X years @ Such and Such Inc. Do we know if (s)he is celebrating or cringing?  Perhaps a better way to portray will be - So and So LASTED X years @ such & such inc. Then it exhorts the readership to go ahead and congratulate them for this lasting effe...
2 comments
Read more