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Bumper Literature

When you drive as much as I do in California you end up looking for distractions from the actual act of driving.  Enter fancy vanity plates and bumper stickers on vehicles.  These range from clever to moronic yet everyone takes their shot at them.

Vanity plates is the height of - yep - vanity- because people actually cough up more money to their governments to explain their thoughts on the license plate of their car.  Its their paid license to exercise their first amendment rights.

Most of these same folks also complain about how their government is out to get them on variety of taxes.  Yet they think nothing about putting their thoughts on a plate like 'LAWYAH', or 'K8SBMW', or 'PORHSA'.  Duh?

Then come the stickers.  These can be applied on bumpers or any part of your automobile that you feel is reasonable to hold the item and ensure large readership.  Substantial revenues are collected by a variety of sticker crafting institutions including schools, colleges and other marginal education peddling entities and individuals affiliated with them.

Then there are the religious zealots to non profits to government entities to just weirdos with their own brand of advertising, all offered by capitalists in varying forms trying to suck the moronic species dry.

Some sample ones that I have observed for a while include -
PROUD PARENT OF A HONOR ROLL STUDENT AT WENGER ELEMENTARY SCHOOL

First of all how does that help me?  Second - if you are proud why say it in a sticker?  If you were not would you even have a sticker?  Third - are you proud of your student or yourself?  Very confusing and stupid.

CHICO STATE DAD

What?  You are a father to the entire state?  And oh if I am from Nebraska I am wondering when they passed the bill to make CHICO a state.  Who Chico?  Not to be outdone there are of course

CHICO STATE MOMS.  I mean they too have a say.

People with weirdo COEXIST stickers are some of the worst drivers ready to mow down someone else.

Animal loving wackos tend to also carry their pets in the driver seat.  Clearly we know who is in the driver's seat!

A funny one I have seen said - IF YOU CAN READ THIS YOU ARE TOO DAMN CLOSE

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